Welcome to The Messy Middle.

about rach, about us, & about the mess.

Nov 21, 2022

Hi Pretty Human,

Wowza, I’m so glad you’re here. The funny thing about existing is that without the reflection of someone else, we can’t be completely sure we’re real. The same goes for my writing—I can write all I want, but without you, dear reader, my writing doesn’t really exist. You complete the circle, and I’m eternally grateful to have you in the loop.

Teensy Bit About Rach

My name is Rachel Havekost, and I feel like I’m writing a back-to-school intro bio (was that a thing, or am I making that up?)

hi i don’t like self-promotion but my bestselling memoir “Where the River Flows” was a #1 new release in multiple categories so here is me telling you about it :)

Learn More about Rach's Memoir

Vocationally, I’m an author and mental health blogger in a situationship with social media (ask me how I feel about instagram). Emotionally, I’m socially anxious, prone to depressive episodes, yet wildly hopeful about living. Physically, I move this body to any country I can afford, enjoy shutting the world out for an hour while lifting tiny weights, and am covered in sticker-tats. But mostly, I’m a full-time human.

After several years of using Instagram and TikTok (I’ll link my socials at the end), I’ve found myself longing more and more for ways to connect with you outside of social media. Free of the constant comparison, free of everything that’s wrong with me (and all the paid solutions to fix it), and free of ads.

Then I stumbled on Substack. Voila.

About The Messy Middle

Starting on January 22nd, 2024, The Messy Middle will pause it’s “seasonal” format.

For all of 2023, I produced pieces inside four separate seasons. This was a wonderful way to have themes and a structure that allowed us to move through topics together.

My personal life (therapy, lessons learned, dating as a divorced 34-year-old, ED recovery, etc) informed my pieces. This was vital, therapeutic, and what motivated me.

This year, I am less focused on my personal life as the vehicle for my writing. I long for more privacy and don’t have as much need or interest in sharing everything and anything in my life.

For this reason, The Messy Middle will shift in its content, structure, and format.

Here is what you can expect from The Messy Middle in 2024:

Interviews and Podcasts: I am on a MASSIVE mission this year to cultivate community, and the way I see that unfolding on Substack is shared storytelling. If you are someone who knows a thing or two (or three) about mental health, psychology, sociology, neurobiology, education, childhood development, or think you could add value to my audience’s experience, send me an e-mail.

E-mail Me for an Interview!

Newsletters: My newsletters will remain ridiculously charming, inquisitively educational, and always brutally honest. You can still expect stories from my life as someone in recovery, post-divorce, and embracing my humanity shame-free. You can also expect educational pieces that include up to date research on topics like friendship-making, coping with life, and battling mental illness.

Mess Hall (chat forum & community connection): The Mess Hall (or chat thread) is where you’ll get updates, check-ins, love notes, and invitations to private events, workshops, and ways to connect not just with me but others.
Zoom Gatherings: My goal in 2024 is to host AT LEAST one Zoom call per quarter to facilitate connection. This might look like sharing our writing, learning a skill, or a guest host offering a service. Paid subscribers will automatically be able to join these for free. Free subscribers have the option to pay per gathering, or upgrade to join.
To get access to quarterly gatherings, all newsletters, and podcasts/interviews (and simply support my work!), it would mean the MOST if you became a paid subscriber.

Subscriptions are only $5/month (literally one coffee!) or $50/year (two months free!).

It might not seem like much, but you becoming a paid subscriber makes a massive difference to me, my work, and my ability to keep pumping out free/low cost support.

If you’re not sure The Messy Middle is for you, you can do a free trial of the paid version for 7 days! Just click the button below to give this community a test drive.

Get 7 day free trial

Make the Most of the Messy Middle

Whether you’re a free or paid subscriber, here are some ways to make the most of your time here in the mess:

Mark me “not spam” (lol)

If you can’t find a newsletter, check your spam folder. I highly suggest you mark this e-mail address as “not spam.” If the newsletter isn’t in your spam folder, either, check in the Promotions or Updates tab.

Download the App!

When you download the app, you’ll be able to access our exclusive chat, where I frequently check-in, offer support, and help connect you to other pretty humans! To download the app, click here or the button below.